On Dating ...

I mentioned earlier that baseball was not played at the "A" field in Worcester, but it was. Our sports fields were not adjacent to our High Schools as is so convenient for you kids. Dad played catcher. In football he was a center & perhaps linebacker. You know me, I have a whole scrapbook of his clippings. I guess it would be fun to go through them again sometime. He was a "star" on their teams.

I worked at a First National grocery store part time during HS as a cashier and loved it. By the way, I was a great "bag packer" if i do say so myself. Also was a very good student; loved math especially and had thought of studying accounting but not encouraged then as it was a "male" field and few women entered the field. Strange that Erin & Jeff are now in those fields. Not all the time, but nursing and teaching were fields usually girls went into if did not go out to work right after HS as secretaries,etc. Many married young, a yr or two out of HS. I could never see myself married at such a young age. But you know, they are all still married 45, 50 yrs later and happy. A couple of my close friends did get married very soon and had babies right away. We fell away from each other for a while as going in different directions.

We started with nothing and worked hard together for things and went without most often. You soon found out what was important and what was not. I did not know anyone who came from a divorced/separated family then. Maybe there was & I was unaware, but nothing that stands out. Mothers were usually home and took care of the house & kids. No empty homes as now; simple life. I am backtracking I know but always think of other things as we go along.

As I said, we started dating regularly almost right away. It was just "right". Dad was sensitive, thoughtful, hard working, dependable, considerate ... do you see those sides of him? Usually Dads have to be the provider, the strength and sail of the family. Sometimes kids do not realize those sides of them. I feel those are very important qualities. Always did and still do know that we can always count on him to be there.

Ok, Dad would meet me after school and walk home with me, about 2 miles, to Heard Street ... and I loved walking. Always did and still do. His school, St. Peters, was just down the street and he would get out early. Sometimes he would come into school to find me as I was an "office girl" (special job) which meant I sat outside the office and served as a conduit or delivery person to classrooms. Nothing special, but it was fun. I was so afraid he would get caught & get in trouble, but never did. We went to many dances; the jitterbug, the slide, twist, etc were some of the common dances. Loved that! American Bandstand, a TV show, was popular. Up coming performers started there and it was a dance show where they would perform also. Many went on to professional careers from there.

We would go to other dances of both our high schools, special dances at barns or Sadie Hawkins dances where girls asked the boys. I was shy about that. We went toc movies, sports games, soda shoppes, drive-in movies, minature golf, ice skating, bowling. On Thursday nights the stores downtown were opened late and we all went downtown sometimes to gather (albeit shop)We would go out to eat sometimes. One place especially; theEl Morocco. They had great shish-ka-bobs!! There was another place we went for spaghetti that was so good. I cannot remember the name but perhaps Dad would ... he remembers much more than I. For a "special" dance we would go to The Totem Pole (I forgot what town it was in ) and it was on a lake; beautiful setting which had big name bands like Benny Goodman, etc. and dancing. You would dress up in semi gowns for that and we always had lots of fun.

Then I graduated and Dad was a senior in HS at that time as he went later to school. When I graduated I went to St Vincent's Hospital School of Nursing which was nice and I loved it. Met many nice girls and my roomate was Pat Renihan (now Gorman). There were ten of us who were especially close and we recently had a reunion here in the Berkshires that I planned. They came from all over; Alaska, Michigan, Virginia, Maine, Connecticut. We had many laughs and so much fun. Now they want to do it every year or two. It was like we just picked up where we left off when graduated in '62.

Dad went to Worcester Academy as a PG student when he graduated and surprisingly their practice field was right next door to our dorm. Of course, I had to work every other weekend and often evening hours so not together as much, but we stuck it out. I guess it was just meant to be. Not that we didn't have squabbles and take some space. When I dated someone else, Dad's network usually spotted me and told him. He was on my doorstep very quickly; jealous, but not angry. Sometimes you have to shake things up a bit. I remember New Years nights when at school and if we were going out and not coming back to the dorm we had to have written note from home giving us permission. If we came back to dorm our curfew was 12:00, like Cinderella.

Then on to UMass on a football scholarship. We added frat parties, etc to our fun then. I stayed in an all girls dorm there and he lived at the frat house. Crazy guys who went on to be very successful. Most were fball players. It was SAE fraternity. I remember going once for Winter Carnival and they were making a snow sculpture. However, it ended up being just a pile of snow named "Avalance in the Alps" ... so not always serious, but well meaning. It was a party frat. They had a Housemother who lived in the house, Mrs Chatelle, who was a sweetheart and they all were "her boys". On Party nights they would buy her ice cream and she would never come out of her bedroom; she was a saint. They were good to her but a lively house. Dad did OK in studies first year or two and even made Maroon Honor Society. Not always as serious perhaps as he could have been. Spent many nights talking long distance on the phone. Not an easy task as only a couple of phones in my dorm to serve many girls so I had to sit by the phone for a call to come in at pre-arranged time; sometimes worked and sometimes not. I wore a uniform at St V's which was a blue striped dress, white apron, nursing cap and a wool cape. We were pretty classy I think. Dress for boys and girls then was very traditrional. No slacks for girls that I can remember. Madras plaid skrts, chino pants, jumpers or skirts as well as dresses and full skirts... gray wool pants and oxford shirts (pink was the color). Alsio, jerseys. Lots of school shirts and sweaters. I do not even remember if dad wore jeans. Girls did not that I can think of.

We dated for four years before we married and had talked about it for a while. When Dad gave me his fraternity pin and "pinned me" that was like a pre-engagement. He put it in a cracker jack box and when I pulled it out I thought it was the prize naively and said look, it looks just like your fraternity pin. "Well yeah ... it is." Dad gave me a hope chest my second year in training for Christmas and surprised me. He had called Aunt Clara and had it delivered home. A hope chest was given when serious about relationship and thinking of marriage to put things in for when you did get married.

Even then we would drift apart. I remember once dating one of Uncle Joe's buddies who was in dental school. We had been out on lake renting a boat all day and drove by the soda shoppe where Dad happened to be. Not for long though as he was at my house in no time at all. So we always gravitated right back together and perhaps knew we would eventually marry. I think Aunt Clara was a bit worried I would not finish at St V's but that was never a question. Finishing was always my intention. Will stop now as have been going on for too long already. Will finish up later.

Mom

How They Met ...

Here goes...

Dad & I met at a school dance in Worcester at the end of my Junior Yr in HS. It was a record hop as you have DJ's spinning records. We had '78 records then and a person from a local radio station would be the DJ. Kids from all schools and from all over Worcester usually went and it was fun. They had dances all over Worcester most weekends at a church hall or school gym, so most kids knew how to dance ok. Not like nowadays when they do not dance as much.

We met at South High school (where I went to school). Then, the boys usually did all the asking to dance and at some point during the night he asked me. He was a great dancer and we had fun. Rock & Roll was popular music ... Fats Domino, Paul Anka, Beach Boys, Elvis Presley, Pat Boone and more that Dad might remember. The Jitterbug was popular at the time.

We spent most of the night together getting to know each other. Dad was "big jock" in the Worcester area as I found out as we started dating after that. He was a regular on the All-City sports honor teams each year since his Freshman year at ST Peter's HS ..... and quite handsome I might add. Being all-city was a big honor as it was selected from all high schools in the Worcester area ... and there were many. He played at the "A" Field in Worcester which was a sports complex for all high schools in the city. Teams of all sorts I think, except bball. He also was on student council and a member of other clubs at school. He worked at a grocery store part time as well.

Anyways, we started dating after that and just kept going for the rest of HS thru St Vincent's Nursing School and Worcester Academy and then on to UM. We went to many dances, proms, etc. Some school club dances were held at a local barn which was fun. I sometimes went with other boys from St John's Prep school too of which he was not happy at the time. He now calls them the "shrimps" as they were shorter than he was and those plans were already in the works when i met him.

We started "going steady" after a few months, which meant I got his letter sweater to wear as well as his class ring with lots of tape rolled around it so it fit me ... COOL!! We double dated a lot as Dad did not have access to a car but going with others was always fun .... Sometimes ... except during the cold winter nights when he would leave my house when we did not go out but stayed in to watch TV. Looking back, I feel so bad for him as he would leave my house bet 11 -12 PM in all kinds of weather, walk down the hill past the park to Webster Square and hitch a ride home to the other side of Worcester .... a long ways away, sometimes taking a couple of hrs on a slow night, freezing outside etc. Now, as a parent, I would die if you kids did that ... I guess if he went through all that it was destined to be ... the rest is history...

Love,

MOM

and Dad's, in an email titled "Mom's Orders" ...

Dan, Mom's been on me to write something, even though I have been doing a complete journal for a while. I first saw your mother at a CYC parade in Worcester, and fell in love with her at first sight. She was marching with her church group and I was with the St. Peters group too cool to march! A few weeks later at a South High record hop I saw her again, this was not my school, but a lot of people came from all over Worcester to these Dances. I built enough courage to ask her to dance and she agreed. She was a grade ahead of me so this was not the way that most high school kids dated, so I was lucky. We talked on the phone a lot, hours at a time. Dated all through her senior year and my jr. and senior year and a year of Prep school. After my Soph. year year we got married and Jeff came along soon after. Mom had finished nursing school that year so she worked until Jeff.

That's it.

Dad